There's a song called "Once In A Lifetime" by the Talking Heads with the line in it: 'you may ask yourself, well, how did I get here?' It's been running through my head for the past several weeks and I can't seem to shake it. I remember the video from early MTV days and while it was just a fun song back then that didn't, and still doesn't, hold any particular meaning to me, I keep finding myself thinking about the title and referring to those lines in the song - along with a few others like:
>>And you may ask yourself
Where does that highway go?
And you may ask yourself
Am I right? ...am I wrong?
And you may tell yourself
My god!...what have I done?<<
It's right about then I break out in cold sweat!! I guess for me now, it's just the idea that you can wake up one day and find yourself in a place you could've never imagined, doing things you never dreamed possible and you have no idea how you got there. I mean really, how does someone who's been severely overweight and pretty inactive their entire life end up in an Ironman Triathlon competition? It just makes no sense to me so I keep asking myself, well, how did I get here?
As I think about it, certainly there's been a sequence of events in my life over the past four years that has taken me down this path and I'm realizing that it's lined with family and friends, both old an new and colleagues and competitors alike. And they've all guided, and pushed, and supported, and motivated, and inspired and moved me every step of the way. From my family who got me started on Weight Watchers in the fall of 2003 and my friends who encouraged and put up with me as I started to change so drastically, along with all the dedicated online and meeting members and leaders who continue to inspire and support me as I inch my way towards my goal. There's my gym crew who motivate me to show up at 6:00 a.m. and my spin instructors who helped push me out the door and put me on the road to begin with. There's my cycling club gang who challenge and complement my riding all at the same time. And this past year especially riding and running and learning to swim was so much fun because I trained with people with similar goals and ambitions who loved it too. Plus I've been fortunate in that I've managed to work with some great coaches and mentors and counselors who've always seemed to have my best interests at heart. And for the past year I've had a friend and training partner who's far younger, faster and stronger than myself, and pushes me past what I would consider a reasonable limit. She is certainly smart enough to make her own judgments when I provide pointers and I profess to be "older and wiser" but it’s her determination and dedication to triathlon as a sport that has finally started to rub off on me. I'm thankful that we'll be training to compete together in 2008 70.3 and Ironman events.
And I couldn't begin to explain how much it meant to me when it was so many of these same people who stood by me and made and kept me strong as I faced my cancer diagnosis. And despite all the physical changes my body had been through previously, it took this event to really change my life and force me to realize how fortunate and blessed I've been. Having any kind of cancer is scary for sure, but I was far luckier than most and couldn't be more grateful for the experience I've had, for all I've learned, for the people I've met because of it and for all of life's graces that I've been given.
I can attest that the folks at Triathlete Magazine got it right when they talked about my 'second chance' - actually I think I've had a few of them and few people are that fortunate. And because of this perhaps it's my responsibility to make the most of all the opportunities I've been given, to not just sit idly by or fritter it away, but rather to stand up and get out make the most of it. I can't say that I ever sat back and made a conscious decision to make triathlon my 'vehicle' of choice in this regard, but with this contest it's more like Ironman Triathlon picked me, and considering how unlikely this all is, well who am I to argue?!
It feels like this contest has been a great catalyst for all of us, and I think I speak for at least a few of us when I say it's pushed us WAY outside of any comfort zone we may have known. But as long as we’re here, there's no doubt we're all looking to make the most of this incredible opportunity we've been given. And I'd be remiss if I didn't acknowledge and thank all the great people associated with this contest. The New York City event was a wild rush enjoyed by everyone who attended. And without trying to suck up too much, I can also say that everyone I've met through this contest has been great! Not only all the other contestants and finalists from NYC, but especially all the Cadence staff and coaches, the sponsor representatives and of course the judges. Sure the time trialing and endurance tests were fun and all ;-), but it was all the great people involved in this event that have really sealed it as being 'once in a lifetime!'
So as I slap myself on the forehead and ponder "Well, how did I get here?" I'm still not exactly sure, but I know I didn't get here by myself.
